Melony Louise's Natural Habitat

Cingular could fall of the face of the Earth right now and my only problem would be that my mom just wasted a hundred dollars on a new phone from them.

People kept telling me "oh, you know, they'll replace the screen it'll be like thirty dollars." Well, I was informed that since the screen was an LCD, it was full phone damage. I'd have to buy a new phone, just like my old one, no discounts, two hundred and eighty dollars.

I started to go down this path, but I said, "fuck that shit." I got a RAZR, which will have only cost sixty once I get the refund in a month or so and will be much less likely to break in three months. Mum asked, "what about insurance?" "That's five dollars a month per phone line, making a replacement phone only fifty, but you can only do this two times a year." "Fuck. You."

Then, I saw the greatest sign in the world: "Special Offer! One Case For Ten Dollars, Two Cases For Twenty Dollars!" Okay people, this isn't a "special offer," this is math. Please, learn the difference!

Okay, well my mum's mom is coming to visit today, and we get to drive her to my aunt's. I can flaunt my bruises, my phone, my holes, it'll be great.